Our thoughts oh so totally Random =)

Welcome to the oh so spastic and retarded blog!! dedicated to triple and dual posts. Enjoy the rubbish!! and tag. now. quick. i say TAG oh wait. read first. =D profile
*CAROL*(red)
aka Xiaohui, [Last Requiem]ahrol, rolrol by zijin
NYGH
16
Ex-Riflist of Nyshooting School Team
17071992
Lame Little, Mad Little,Complicated Little Weird little Trng Girl
GIRL GONE WILD

~ZIJIN~(dark blue)
aka Tissue-the-great-idito!AHZAN/wuzan/laopo by shiing.
NYGH
sweet 16 already yay!!
Riflist, School Team
11041992
Hyper High Huggable Highly Abnormal Randomization Queen
HELPLESS BASKETCASE

[shiing](orange)
aka Muachee,darling by eening, laopo/taymua/ahmua by zijin
16
Riflist, School Team
17121992
~~Clumsy Accident Prone*ouch* Madly Nice Crazy Party Girl(Hyper after 9:30pm)~~
MUACHEE~EXTRA NUTS,EXTRA SUGAR,EXTRA CUTE!

^^Ee Ning^^(blue green)
aka darling(by shi ing) and OOINING by carol and mr tan.
16
Riflist'06.Pistolist '08
22121992
Pokable Pokie Pig who likes to Poke Ppl.
HYPER,HUGGABLE,HONEYED CUTIE PIE Dearest DARLINKS! +
NY Shooting Club + Michelle + Carol + Chen Tian + Ee Ning + Eunice Kho +
Hsin Fang +
Xin Mei + July 2006
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September 2015
i'm..really coming back to this blog for this firs...
first two days of school..quite boring actually. d...
first of allHAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE FOUR PPL I KNOW!...
hahahaha yes tissue is here to blog.and NO IM NOT ...
zijin is quite irritated at how these certain 2 pp...
its only the first week of 2009 and i already feel...
ahahahahahaha omg today is so retarded.on the bus ...
AH HA! (:tissue just went to cut hair after much d...
tissue is not in a very good mood nowthough i jus ...
MERRY XMAS BABES!!!!=]HAPPY PARTYING~i wanna go pa...

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I'm sure this colour has not been seen in So Cliche since 2007. Just to refresh your memory, I'm Ah Rol. Ex riflist of NYGH Shooting Team. Now in NJshooting and dressed in grey.
as you all know,
I left the team and NYGH in March 2008 to pursue what I thought was right, transferring to NJC. Despite all that has happened, Zijin, Shiing, and Eening have been so vivid in my mind and I still feel close to them despite the distance, the difference in characters, events, lives, everything that constitutes a person's identity and world. I have never forgotten the team. I have never forgotten what we've done, what we've achieved together, though our record has been broken by a new generation.
I was inspired to blog this post after reading Ah Mua's post as I was seriously touched by what she said. So here goes, in a similar format.

Ah Zan.
from the day i met you, you have grown in height. Even now, I have to look up to you.
a far cry from our secondary 1-2 days.
everytime I showed you my cards in the morning, and you said " Ah rol, that's good"
I felt like I had done something that mattered.
You have been there for me, through thick and thin and fat and skinny.
you withstood all the unreasonable crap and shit I managed to throw at you through impassioned fits and tantrums brought on by shitty training or emotional waves.
when I lashed out at you because I couldn't stand the idea that I sucked, you took it all and still reached out with loving arms to hug me, to comfort me. And when you couldn't stand it and snapped, I deserved all the shit that you threw at me through this blog, even though little of it was unfairly said. I deserved it all.
And yet, after that,
we're closer. and a random statement, your emoticon really looks like you.
Every time I see that face, something in me unknots and I think, everything's going to be ok.
We're closer and our bond is so much stronger because of the incident. I look back at it and I think to myself, what an ass I was.
I miss the days of seeing you everyday, of being able to share with you jokes, talk about teachers, training.
I miss sitting in the dark and just stoning before training.
Yet here we are today.
I remember the conversations we had during lectures in the LT scribbling in my notebook about the Croc and nationals. I still have the sketch of the nationals that i drew. I'll scan it in.
we've grown closer. yet further because of one stupid canal and two stupid roads.
I made that choice, I don't regret it. I regret the loss of the team still.
I love you for all of that. Thank you for all that you have done. I'm weak, but you and ah mua managed to make me strong.
I.. crap. crap crud SUGAR, why are 3 words INSUFFICIENT. see la ah mua, i'm crying cos of you. mental block. emotions really screw you up. heng ah, now not my period(TMI) otherwise i would be typing emotional crap.
Zan, I love you, and I wouldn't be where I am without you, you who have been a true friend more times than I can count. 3 times national champion, overseas shooter in Nanjing, etc. Thank you for seeing the good in me while admonishing me for the bad even when I didn't want to see.Thank you for talking me out of training slumps; most importantly, for having faith in me. You were a comforting presence by my side, a solid rock i could lean onand that presence still lingers. You were the one I felt closest to you.

Ah mua. muah-chee. full of angles when i try and hug you. I have bruises from those attempts.
I have sat at that very same spot for many a time now and still I feel your presence beside me while waiting.
It's true, what I said. I felt as if there was glass separating us, an invisible barrier that i could somehow, not break through. I couldn't reach out to you, I couldn't help you, I couldn't help you through whatever pain you went through. And yet you were always by my side, peacemaking Zan and my fiery temper. It hurt me, that I couldn't help you even when you were helping me. Stepping in for me whenever my DM sucked, letting me jump on you even though there was a possibility of me breaking your bones. I still have kept the sms you sent to me when I was in KL for SEASA: " Ah rol, you are stepping out into the world of international shooting. JIA YOU" or something of the like. haha.... I never forgot the encouragement that you gave me over the years. None of it. you kept pushing me up when I fell and couldn't get up because of the bruises and scrapes that failure left on me. I've said this to ah Zan, and I'll say it again. I wouldn't be where I am now, 3 times National Champion, without you. You help to make me who I am right now. I love you. Everytime I hugged you, I thought of Muahchee with a backbone of rocksugar that couldn't be broken no matter what kind of shit that life threw at you. I still only have a small inkling of what kind of shit Life threw at you, but I'll never know the full story and maybe, it's meant to stay that way. I love you. Thank you for what you've done for me.

TO ZAN AND MUA, a DUAL POST
zan mua, i've said this twice now, and they say 3 times is the winner. You helped make me who I am. Ever since I went to NJ, I didn't know about your lives anymore. Yet when I crashed this year with a magnificent 304, you were there to comfort me. It's like guardian angels, you two knew about my life but I didn't know about yours. I couldn't give even when you gave me your love and care and concern and help and that hurts. Ah wells. I love you two. I miss you guys. I can't imagine an adulthood without you guys in it, flitting around here and there.

AH NING
hey ooining...
i'm sorry for being one of the most distant team members. You were the one, are the one I still know the least about. As a team, we managed, and I regret not getting to know you better. I love you. thank you for all you did in Sec1, sec2, and sec3, including the birthday gifts that you gave even when I was probably one of the most distant members. Thank you. <3>

# posted by So Cliché at 12:43 AM